I created this piece somewhat spontaneously. 2022 was, truthfully, a difficult year for me. The idea to name it as I did came later, once all the pieces fell into place.
In 2022, I lost my father to a long-term battle with alcohol addiction while I was far from home. Meanwhile, the Russian government started the war in Ukraine. This profoundly shifted my perspective as a Russian citizen. I became increasingly worried about my family in Saint-Petersburg and my other relatives in Kharkov, all while trying to navigate my own path in a world that felt increasingly unstable.
Amidst grief and fear, I found it fascinating how small things could provide support and comfort during such chaos within me.
I had always perceived tragic events as experiences that engulf you in extreme emotions like anger or hysteria. However, for me, the world seemed to divide into darkness, punctuated by routine objects and actions that offered me moments of joy, almost as if nothing had happened. Pain felt absent; there was a peculiar dichotomy of darkness illuminated by small beams of light.
This necklace reflects that period of my life—perhaps in a strange way. I wanted to incorporate whimsical depictions of peace, like a little bunny or a favorite cup of coffee. But the necklace is more than just a collection of episodes, emotions, and memories; it flows together to create an image of a skull-like smile with dull eyes. It evokes the somber imagery of funeral ribbons and sharp cemetery fences while highlighting the childlike discomfort we often feel when confronting topics of death and funerals.
