Inspired by a “relationship” I’m having recently, I’ve been thinking that one can never not be lonely, especially the weak one in a “relationship”. Over exposure/honesty drives the other away. Two people cannot merge to one. Space/distance must exist. Connection makes me want to be honest with the other, but I can’t expose all my thoughts with the other. I can’t rely on the other completely. I have to keep away from the boundary. Or I’ll destroy this relationship, if it is a relationship. But this gap makes this connection not complete. I always have to control myself. I have to hold myself together. I can’t ask the other to protect me or save me. This control makes me unable to fully experience the connection with the other. Individual is always individual. One always exists on his/her own. It’s all because I’m powerless. I’m not the domination of my own body/existence. I can’t rely on myself.
So, how close/connected can we be?